The Epic Living In a Parallel Universe Saga - Caution: Contains R16 and Gay Abandon
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Thread: The Epic Living In a Parallel Universe Saga - Caution: Contains R16 and Gay Abandon

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    Member Austria Wild's Avatar
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    Default The Epic Living In a Parallel Universe Saga - Caution: Contains R16 and Gay Abandon

    Chapter 1 - The hunt


    I do not want to blame a meanwhile sadly way too distant youth, which was spent in seven R16s my father had bought new in three year intervals, but about ten years ago, a massive R16 wantage was felt deep inside me. It may be the result of having driven yank tanks almost exclusively for a quarter century. For me, it was either made in Trumpreich, or it wasn't a car. Then something odd happened. When looking over a seemingly impeccable '72 Imperial that was for sale, it left me oddly cold and I walked away. Mind you, the car would have stirred my bloom and made me maxing out my overdraft and credit cards just a short while before, but this time I thought naw, I want something less familiar for the second half of my driving career.

    I then spent eight years trying all kinds of stuff, like the ones with the three pointed swastika (they are just awful), Range Rovers (they are sublime, but you need to sell your kidneys to afford the petrol) and a succession of Rover P6 V8s, one of which having been possessed by an evil spirit, living with the other ones was like having a super pretty girlfriend that is raving bonkers in all other aspects. We've all been there.

    But all the while there were some big letters before my spiritual eye - R16.
    The hunt began in earnest in 2015. I didn't even bother to look in the UK, since I wanted a LHD, because I'm weird and think this is just so much more authentic. My search was hence expanded to the shores across the sea, all 32 km of it, namely France. Imagine my disappointment when I discovered that the R16's motherland only yielded a mountain of hopeless rubbish, sparsely interspersed with the odd nice example, which was then so heavily scene taxed, that I just wasn't willing to pay the price.

    I thus expanded my search further afield and the object of desire materialised in - you'd have never guessed it - Germany!

    A classic car dealer located in the outback West of Hamburg had one advertised online, the car seemed right, the price seemed right, so in typical fashion when buying a 50 year old car, a deal was struck over the phone. This naturally triggered travelling, something I appreciate about as much as bedbugs, unless it's done by the natural locomotion of an adult male - driving a motorcar.

    After obtaining some tickets for one of those flying cigars (a friend was masochistic enough to join me for the trip), further travel preparations were made:




    It began:





    Clue: We were either in an aeroplane, or a series one Rover P6:




    Okay, not a P6 then:




    After enduring much public transport, we arrived at one of Hamburg's railway stations:




    After changing trains several times, we were spat out in the wastelands the dealer was located.

    We were greeted by a friendly cat.





    The dealer had some wonderful chod on offer.
































    Finally I got my first glimpse of OMG what have I doneness:






    At least the two most important components of any car were functional:





    Advertisement



    Consequently I was happy.




    And thus, my fellow frogs, endeth chapter one.
    Next chapter: The Retrieval

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    1000+ Posts schlitzaugen's Avatar
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    Nice write up, but I thought Mercs were awful?

    And judging by the love for Range Rovers, I take it you live somewhere muddy.

    Out of that collection I would have had the Manta.

    Nice R16. I would like one. The one quintessential Renault that has eluded me.

    Noticed it is a belgian car though. How's the rust situation?

    Welcome to our little support group for the hopelessly addicted.
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    ACHTUNG ALLES LOOKENPEEPERS

    Das computermachine is nicht fur gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und poppencorken mit spitssparken. Ist nicht fur gewerken bei das dummkopfen. Das rubbernecken sightseeren keepen hands in das pockets-relaxen und watch das blinkenlights.

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    The W108 might be the sole exception.

    Yes, I live near the town centre.

    Give me a Diplomat instead every day of the week.

    Get one.

    It's wearing a German dealer plate in the pic. More on everything else later.

    Thank you.

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    Chapter 2 - The Retrieval

    After the first spottage of the car and a quite comprehensive test drive, we decided it was time to commandeer our digs for the night.
    A suitable harbourage was found.




    There are no crocodiles in Germany.




    It was ladies' choice that evening.




    So we did the only sensible thing there is to do in such circumstances.





    In order to get the car out of Germany, we had to obtain export plates, which was commenced the next day bright and early.
    For that, the dealer drove us to a fairly distant town.



    Little did we know that German bureaucracy would require to spend almost an entire day in some office building.
    However, the time was not spent in vain, it enabled us to discover that the Germans do have a sense of humour after all.
    This is the picture they had hung up in the staircase:





    In the end, we got our export plates and finally were on the road back to civilization.



    No, we didn't risk a head on collision, this was a dual carriageway.


    Food for car.




    Food for people.




    We crossed the border into the Netherlands. There are Giraffes in the Netherlands.




    Previous owners left us one CD.



    We had no CD player.


    Uhh.




    We decided to press on regardless and see what happens.
    Nothing actually happened.
    But we missed the ferry. We waited until the very last possible second to switch on the sidelights. With 15km to go, the fuel gauge was resting on its stop. By now we had less than half an hour before the 11pm ferry, but we couldn't risk the fuel level anymore.
    We missed the second ferry.

    We finally reached the ferry port late at night.






    The car kept starting and running normally, although it blew a breather pipe leading to poor idle and ferry repairs.




    England!




    Economy from start to Dover: 36mpg / 7.87 l/100.
    And that's with a cling film wrapped bonnet on the roof having unfortunate aerodynamic effects, but it made for a formidable safari roof.

    In the end, home was achieved without any untoward problems.





    Of course there will be a next chapter. Many in fact.

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    1000+ Posts schlitzaugen's Avatar
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    Well, my eyes are not what they used to be.

    If there's kangaroos in Austria, why wouldn't there be giraffes in Holland?
    ACHTUNG ALLES LOOKENPEEPERS

    Das computermachine is nicht fur gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und poppencorken mit spitssparken. Ist nicht fur gewerken bei das dummkopfen. Das rubbernecken sightseeren keepen hands in das pockets-relaxen und watch das blinkenlights.

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    Too many posts! JohnW's Avatar
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    Nice 16 and just near my cousin's house! I'm staggered by the density of traffic in Stockport - a rare argument in favour of getting a TSA!

    It looks as if Holland is the same as Australia with people shooting holes in roadsignsÖ

    Seriously, do you know of the Renault Classic Car Club in UK? They have several 16 owners.

    Enjoy it - fabulous cars, R16s.
    JohnW

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    I am a member of the Renault Classic Car Club, but I know more R16 owners outside the club than in it.
    One big disadvantage of mine is that it is still a 1967 model, one year before the ones you can get spares for.
    For me that's part of the attraction, because weird.

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    Hah. Fantastic work. Great saga. Great car. You'll love them. Very addictive and such a hoot to drive. Thanks for sharing. You'll need to keep us all up to date with future episodes.

    Glad you dropped in on us at Aussie Frogs. AF is a bit like AA (or so I'm told about AA) in that we all know we have a weakness but all try to help each other in any way we can. Not necessarily to quit but to prevent it costing too much money or causing too much frustration. Welcome.
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    Believe it or not. 1992 on a bus tour around Europe. Says the tour guide "we have just crossed into Austria". It had to be a citizen of good ole USA to ask "will we see kangroos".
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    It was the constant inquiring by Trumpistanian tourists that prompted the whole "No Kangaroos in Austria" movement.
    I let you in on another secret: There is no Hard Rock Cafe in Salzburg!

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    Chapter 3 - Decluttering and Horror

    Roofrack and spare bonnet removed:




    Before:




    After:




    Before:




    After:





    Before:




    After:




    Before:




    After:




    Before:




    After:





    Before:




    After:




    Then it was time to initiate the registration process in England. Back then, you still needed an MoT for that. Since the car had a valid German T‹V, I thought little of it. Imagine my surprise when I saw this test result:



    There appears to be a slight issue, hence I started fixing the most important thing that didn't work:





    Also, the passenger door was locked. Despite the car coming with four separate keys, none unlocked it, which is a bit annoying. I had a peek inside the door, but I couldn't figure out how the barrel is removed. I spent ages jiggling stuff and removing bolts, but it looks like they designed it to only come apart if the door is unlocked.


    Whatever. What happens if I buy a metal kebab skewer, file it into an approximate key shape and then just jam it in the lock?

    This:



    Problem solved. It has a hoop on the end so I put it on the keyring for convenience:





    However, I couldn't procrastinate the failure sheet forever, so inspectage of the undercarriage commencage ensued.
    The tester marked the rotten bits with yellow chalk. The yellow chalk went through the floor in places.






















    I have no idea why they make such a fuss because of a bit of surface rust.
    It could be worse, couldn't it?


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    1000+ Posts schlitzaugen's Avatar
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    Geez. I take it you didn't give a close look at purchase time.
    ACHTUNG ALLES LOOKENPEEPERS

    Das computermachine is nicht fur gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und poppencorken mit spitssparken. Ist nicht fur gewerken bei das dummkopfen. Das rubbernecken sightseeren keepen hands in das pockets-relaxen und watch das blinkenlights.

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    Fellow Frogger! Dano's Avatar
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    Mmm, seems like a little deja vu happening here.

    Nothing is impossible and considering it's some 50 years old, one would expect a little TLC to be required.

    The desire to re-live our younger years/memories is greater than the hurdle of a little rust...

    16's, such a unique car, in so many ways.
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    It's the cheapest way to increase power to weight ratio for improved performance
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    1000+ Posts schlitzaugen's Avatar
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    Either that, or you can go on a diet.
    ACHTUNG ALLES LOOKENPEEPERS

    Das computermachine is nicht fur gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und poppencorken mit spitssparken. Ist nicht fur gewerken bei das dummkopfen. Das rubbernecken sightseeren keepen hands in das pockets-relaxen und watch das blinkenlights.

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    Quote Originally Posted by schlitzaugen View Post
    Geez. I take it you didn't give a close look at purchase time.
    If you followed the saga, it was bought sight unseen over the phone, fired up and driven 1,300 kilometres home with what we back then assumed is an ammeter firmly in the red, as you do with half century old Renaults. Unlike Jaaags, which you buy sight unseen, then pick up in a back alley after dark when it's raining. Guess how I found out the latter.

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    Have you checked for rust in the structure adjacent to the rear suspension mounts? Your photos looked more or less cosmetic but of course that is what you actually SEE.

    Cheers
    JohnW

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    You got to luv Jaaags despite their character building foibles.
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    Fellow Frogger! Dano's Avatar
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    Very vague memory, but do they not also suffer rust under the gearbox?
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    The car has been thoroughly inspected after this discovery, trust me. The floorboards and outer sills were the only things rusted out. The rest is very, very healthy indeed.

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    Too many posts! JohnW's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sunroof View Post
    You got to luv Jaaags despite their character building foibles.
    And their heat generation... I saw a Mk V with power steering and an overdrive gearbox for sale the other day. I still reckon the MkII is one of the best-styled post-war saloon cars. Bill Lyons had a great eye for shapes. There's a MkVII in Perth cut down to make a 2-door and it looks fantastic. A job worthy of Graham.....

    Nice to see this 16 rescued and loved!
    JohnW

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    Quote Originally Posted by Austria Wild View Post
    The car has been thoroughly inspected after this discovery, trust me. The floorboards and outer sills were the only things rusted out. The rest is very, very healthy indeed.
    Really glad to hear that. It sat with water ponded inside presumably from screen/seal leaks not rusted from grass growing up under it?

    So, not too bad to fix then. We're mostly a bit insulated from that sort of rust and run a mile from it, although some hardy souls tackle it. They have my admiration!!

    Enjoy it.
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    JohnW

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    Renault Scenic 2007 (mine)
    Renault Scenic 2006 (daughter's)
    CitroŽn CX Pallas 1980

    National Co-ordinator, Renault 4CV Register of Australia

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    Nice Ro80
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    Quote Originally Posted by Haakon View Post
    Nice Ro80
    Some people...…………. But yes. Yes!
    JohnW

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